Yes, Mark, I suppose that having an alligator up your ass would really shake one up, even to the point where they magically grow a mustache, even if the alligator in question was so weak that poking it with a stick made it run away in fear.

Poor Sue doesn't know what's coming at Pop's place.

What in the hell is a "monster-get," and how in the hell is Mark Trail stopping it with a dead, brittle, dried out branch?

I wonder what snaps first: The branch, or Mark's sense of mercy when Sue lets slip that she's the one draining the wetland.

I refuse to believe that the same alligator from Friday is the one in panel one. Look at it: She's so cute! She's even smiling!

That one in panel two is totally plausible. It's so fully grown and vicious looking that it can speak in large yellow letters. This alligator, Sue, alerts Mark to the fact that the wetland draining cube dweller has entered the once wet wetland, and oh boy is it on!

My prediction: Alligator/Trail vs. Evil Nefarious Person in a no holds barred handicap match tomorrow through Friday. The alligator will get some good licks in, but the woman's pink suit will prove too much, and it'll be up to Mark (and his fist) to win. Funeral on Saturday, snerts on Sunday, Pancakes with Pop, Hockey Mulleted Seed of Chucky, and Sneaky on Monday.

My feeble mind cannot wrap itself around this superior plot twist in what was once merely a story about a few puddles and a thieving raccoon.

What was yesterday thought to be Mark Trail ready to deliver a devastating discourse on the dangers of draining dank, damp wetlands turns out to be a big motherfucking ALLIGATOR, and man is that sonofabitch huge! Luckily, our hapless and nefarious business woman wore heels to her land grab and has fallen! There's nary a mustachioed manservant to take the alligator's bite for her!

It's fine though. Afterall, there's a khaki-clad, forever 32 year old young man out there ready to jump into frame to wrestle alligators at a moments notice. What's that you say? He's not available? Where is he? Looking at some lame old geese with some geezer. Oh well...life can't all be fun and-OHSHITHE'SRIGHTBEHINDYOU!

That wetland may be worthless, but that won't stop the forest animals from pleading for their land Mark Trail from punching your lights out before Sneaky steals your purse.

The Wrath of Charles

Man oh man, that potted plant totally EATS Charlie's foot. Could this be a vicious counterblow to Charlie's upcoming Right Fist 'O Justice?

Meanwhile, That Woman contemplates the miseries of being a woman in business. First, there's no time to fawn over men with 70's porn mustaches and a penchant for pot kicking. Second...well...that's really it. Woe is her.

Plight of the Migrating Geese

9/29/08

In an existential crisis, one goose realizes that he has the ability to speak and makes use of his talent to narrate his flock's journey, which will result in his narrating a mildly successful nature film by Kelly Welly called Plight of the Migrating Geese where most of the footage of the geese will be lost in favor of fake horse stampedes and rockslides.

Mark Trail and Pop have no choice but to stand in awe of that miraculous beast.

9/30/08
Dude, that chick is pissed. She has a point though: They own the land. If Pop and co. be squatters on her property, the government would likely be more concerned about removing them than they are about a few thieving raccoons and dead trees.


10/1/08
Charles is a bitch. He just got swaggerjacked on an obscene level.